Overcoming loneliness as a highly sensitive person
Highly sensitive people love deep connections. And it makes total sense considering how we are wired. Because of our heightened sensitivities, we experience life intensely through our emotions and feelings. And when it comes to love and friendship, we crave a soulful connection.
Many of my highly sensitive students who go through my programs struggle with an intense feeling of loneliness that sometimes turns into despair, sadness and depression. While they crave a human connection, they also are introverted and shy and don’t know how to go about initiating a relationship so they feel stuck with no solutions.
There are solutions that can help you move forward towards creating fulfilling relationships. This will be helpful for you if you are a highly sensitive person, introverted, feel lonely and want to create new friendships.
Meeting people is easy. You meet the cashier at the grocery store and the barista at Starbucks. Making friends takes time. The first step is to figure out what you offer as a friend. What are your interests? What are your values?
A friendship is usually created through a shared experience, common values and common interests. Set an intention to meet people who are aligned with your values and interests. Once you have this figured out, then here are four ways to meet people in a casual setting.
#1: Join a Facebook group.
Find a Facebook group of a topic of interest. There are thousands of Facebook groups including many Facebook groups on being highly sensitive. Facebook groups are created around a topic of interest. You will find groups that match your interests where you can contribute. And as you read the conversations in the groups, you will notice people who post who share your ideas and values. This gives you an opportunity to reach out to them privately and start a dialogue to create a friendship. A friendship can start out long distance and doesn’t have to be in person. Joining a group helps you align with the specific interest of the group. And paying attention to the conversations in the group helps you identify who in the group shares your values and ideas.
#2: Volunteer.
When you volunteer and serve, you are already in a position to be with likeminded people who share the common values of being in service and the cause that you are contributing to. You will have a sense of commonality and something to talk about while you are serving. This allows you to take the focus off of wondering what to talk about and instead places the focus on bonding through a shared common goal of service.
#3: Go to the dog park.
Dog parks are social hour for the dogs AND their owners. People from all walks of life bond over their love and affection for their four legged friends. Even my introverted, very shy mother has become a social flower by taking her dog frequently to the dog park. She can tell me not only details about the other dogs in the park, but also a lot of gossip about the dog owners too! There is nothing that puts a smile on your face and brings out your playful child inside as spending a few hours in a dog park. And if you don’t have a dog, borrow your friend’s dog!
#4: Join a meet up group.
In most cities throughout the world, there are meet up groups. There is typically a meet up for every type of topic. Even meet ups for highly sensitive people and for introverts. There are meet ups for physical activities, adventure, dancing, socializing, business networking, spirituality and sexual orientation. There is a meet up for most every topic. Pick a topic of interest to you and try several meet ups. As soon as you arrive at the meet up tell the organizer you are new and don’t know anyone and ask if they would introduce you around. This takes the pressure off of you to have to go up and introduce yourself to other people. And if you can’t find a meet up that interests you, then start your own. A meet up can be as small as a handful of people. And it can start with a meet up at your own home inviting people over for drinks and appetizers and board games.
Taking the first step to connecting is the only way you will actually start the process of making a friend. Whether you start out by connecting on line, or through volunteering, or exercising your dog or by attending a live group your options are unlimited.
Click here for a free copy of Debbie’s Audio for the highly sensitive person on “How To Tap Into The Goldmine Of Your Prosperity.”
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© 2017, Debbie Lynn Grace. All rights reserved.
